3 films seen recently by me.

1. This Film Is Not Yet Rated
2. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
3. Buy the Ticket - Take the Ride (Hunter S. Thompson doc)

1. This Film Is Not Yet Rated

Pretty much what I expected of the Motion Picture Association of America (MPAA). A secretive organization where no names are known and sex is more taboo than the chopping off of heads or American Psycho forcryingoutloud? And they're not crazy right wing whack job...oh wait. No. Yes, they are crazy right wing whack jobs. Never would've guessed!

The film does hit some of the specifics in American Psycho. Reasons they wanted to give it an NC-17? Mmm, not really for how many people he killed, nor so much how they were kille...well, except for the scene where he drops a chainsaw down a flight of stairs, killing the naked prostitute that was running away from him 'cause he was chasing her with a chainsaw. But more importantly than that was the threesome. That offended MPAA sensibilities. And rightfully so! Nothing gives me the heebie jeebies like THREE PEOPLE HAVING SEX!!! AAAHHHH!!!! Again - three people having sex, and not the two prostitutes getting violently murdered after our pro-antagonist nails them. Actually, when I put it that way, it suddenly makes perfect sense.

I have to change my opinion of this "documentary" now.

SHIT. ROTTEN. LEFT-WING PROPAGANDA. THESE FILMMAKERS HATE AMERICA. DO WHATEVER YOU CAN TO STOP YOUR CHILDREN FROM WATCHING THIS SUBVERSIVE FILM MADE MY NINCOMPOOPS.

2. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

A few things. First, when I go to see Indiana Jones, do I want to see a sci-fi movie? Even better - do you? Also, when I go to see Indiana Jones with a storyboard produced by George Lucas and his special effects team ILM at the helm, I want some bad ass special effects.

Spoilerforshittymovie alert: I got one, and not the other.

This legendary crystal skull we hear so much about? Have you ever seen any of the Alien movies? Imagine one of the alien's heads shrunk to comfortable carrying size, in all white ("crystal"), and looking like you picked it up at a magic shop. Okay? That's what this movie is about. That fucking shitty, $15 looking skull. And you meet live aliens too. And Cate Blanchett looks hot, but cannot maintain a steady accent.

But worst of all - the special effects were laughable at best. An obscene amount of green screen shots. Star Wars evolved into a cartoon world, somewhat appropriately. As outlandish as Indy's always been, it never felt like a cartoon until now.

Harrison Ford looks, sounds, and acts like he's never been more bored.

I just saved you $10.

3. Buy the Ticket - Take the Ride (Hunter S. Thompson doc)

Gary Busey had quite a bit of screen time for someone who had next to nothing to say about Thompson, but it was okay. Busey's crazy, has abnormally large teeth, and is therefore entertaining and hilarious. But I won't pretend. I've never read one of Thompson's books, save a few of his essays. A shame, I know. Regardless, this doc left me thinking like I had a good sense of the man nonetheless (despite, ya know, everyone shoving him and his ideas down my throat because every other young white liberal American has read ALL of his stuff, exceptions noted). With that in mind, I don't recall much that happened in the documentary. We viewers exercised the ol' Thompson excess and loaded the bong with Xango, admiring the taste by...not...stopping.

I may have enjoyed this film the most of the three, but I have the least to say about it. That happens. It's short. Just check it out.